When you get a new job and start work under an established boss, that boss usually gives you some kind of personal orientation. Though perhaps inadequate, such an orientation is at least a well-meant attempt to start a working relationship on the right foot. But when the situation is reversed--when the boss is the departmental newcomer and the subordinates are the old-timers--such attempts at personal relationship-making are rare, in my observation. What most often happens is that the new chief calls the whole department together for some kind of orientation and pep talk, before or after which the chief may have some private sessions with one or two of the top staffers. Most of the new boss-subordinate relationships, however, are left to develop on a basis of chance and hope. Don't let that happen to you.
What you must do, soon after a new chief gets installed, is to take the first step in getting a good relationship established. Don't sit around and hope the new leader will take the initiative. Instead, get yourself into this unknown newcomer's office without delay. Announce your wish to be supportive: "I thought you'd like a rundown on what I'm involved in... I want to be sure I understand your thinking thoroughly..." Three strong hints:
Don't play the role of wise old counselor offering a helping hand to the new kid on the block. Avoid phraseology such as "I'll be happy to give you some guidance" or "I'll show you the ropes." You may, in fact, be offering some such service, but it would be a mistake to say so. Remember that, though you may be a departmental old-timer, you are still a subordinate.
Don't betray excessive nostalgia for your former, departed boss. "It's a shame Jack had to leave," says an unwise subordinate, "we really have had a terrific team going here. I hope the old spirit stays alive ..." Yes, you do want to speak in pleasant terms of the departed chief; and yes, you do want to show that you are a dedicated member of the team. But carefully avoid making your new chief feel like an intruder who has blundered into a private party of old friends. Rather, your aim should be to make the new team leader feel welcome. If you want to talk about the old team spirit, say something like; "I think you're going to enjoy leading this group. You'll find we work together well, and we're eager to know what new adventures you have in mind for us ..."
Obey whatever new rules your new chief may establish, no matter how silly and trivial they may seem. As I remarked before, an incoming new leader almost always likes to make changes of some kind. The changes may be severe, or they may be merely symbolic, designed simply to establish the new source of authority and underline the fact that leadership has changed. Your new boss's new rules may have to do with matters such as the time allowed for coffee breaks or the proper method of entering car mileage on expense accounts. Perhaps you and all the other departmental veterans are certain the new rules won't work, or perhaps you simply consider them too silly to be taken seriously. No matter. Obey them anyway. Your new boss must be granted the prerogative of making symbolic changes in rules. Be thankful if they are only small and symbolic.
If they really don't work, that fact may become self-evident in time and they will be rescinded. If they aren't and if they remain truly irksome, wait until your relationship with the new chief is solidly established before doing anything. The worst thing you can do is to start griping about changes before the new boss has come to know you. If you do that, you get yourself marked with some labels you can do without: "Troublemaker... not a team player...can't live with rules."
Entertainment and Gifts
The boss-subordinate relationship seems to generate a lot of clichés. One of the oldest is the situation in which a subordinate invites a boss home for dinner. I don't know how many TV sitcoms I've watched on this subject.
I must tell you, however, that in real life it is becoming less and less common. George Bellamy, a recently retired General Electric employee, recalls that "inviting the boss home" was a yearly ritual when he started the long climb after World War II. "My wife and I just plain assumed it was part of the job," he says. "So did all the other young couples in our social circle. Once a year or so you invited your boss home for a great gourmet meal. It was always a quite uncomfortable meal, as I recall. I'm sure the boss would just as soon have skipped it too. I was glad to see the custom start to die out in the 1970s."
My advice today: don't make a big deal out of entertaining your boss. If an occasion arises naturally, all right. If, for example, you and your boss are taking off on a trip together and you need to stop at your home to pick up something, then you can easily and naturally suggest that your boss come in for a meal or a drink. Or if you and your boss are waiting for a delayed flight together at an airport, you can offer to buy a couple of beers or some coffee. That is no more than ordinary human hospitality. But to plan a five-course dinner is a different matter. Unless you have known your boss for a long, long time and feel you are more than usually friendly, don't plan any such special entertainments. Leave the office to the office.
I would also counsel you, in general, to avoid giving your boss Christmas or birthday gifts. You will only make the man or woman uncomfortable. In all my observations of the career scene, I have never seen a case in which a subordinate bought a boss's favor by showering him or her with merchandise.
Like any human, however, a boss does feel flattered when somebody pays attention on a special day. I once saw a very adroit move by a young woman in this respect. She had decided that it would be inappropriate to give her boss a personal birthday gift, but she thought he might appreciate something inexpensive from the department as a group. She therefore went to the boss's secretary and asked when the man's birthday was.
The secretary provided the information, then mentioned this conversation to the boss. This was exactly what the young woman had hoped would happen. The boss was secretly pleased and flattered by her attentiveness. When the departmental birthday party was held, she got the credit for it.
